Still Trying - EP 12 - History of Western Lit

SEX! Now that we have your attention!

Ugh… That was cheap. But for real. Let’s talk about it. When should we do that? When’s it okay? When’s it not okay? (Hint: Most ways the Catholics are doing it, not okay). A simple discussion of when it feels right to get down with a new partner, somehow descends into an exploration of the history of Catholicism and male power and control of the means of reproduction. Leyla name drops em’ all trying to confuse Josh: Mary Wolstencraft, Dickens, Hawthorne. They’re all coming for your sexual stigmas and vulnerabilities.

Leyla also has some deeply set childhood trauma from, you guessed it, “Meet the Parents”. No… Not meeting someones parents. The 2000 motion picture comedy, starring Ben Stiller and Robert De Niro of course. And finally, what to do when your date is pregnant. As usual, Reddit has answers.

Still Trying - EP 11 - Low Key Stalking

Our dear friend Heather is on the show today to teach us the secrets to finding a partner: Low key stalk somebody. She would know. She’s married to “a literal angel”. (Her words. Seriously!) That’s not to say she didn’t experience bumps in the road along the way. We’ll hear of her experience getting out of the single world just before the Tinder craze swiped the nation and dating someone with a screamo band neck tattoo. It involves a car theft. It gets pretty wild. After hearing how easy married folks make this whole dating game look, Leyla will get a brand new dating challenge we’re anxious to hear results on.

And of course, Josh is here to circle back around to the geopolitical climate’s impacting romantic and inter-gender relations. His prediction of the rights mainstream weaponization of the #MeToo movement was on overdrive and came to fruition before we even got our next episode out! There’s doctored tapes and wild accusations abound today!

Jim Acosta? He hardly touched her!! (Say it with a hard “drop the R” Boston accent. I swear this format works here.)

Still Trying - EP 10 - All Beef Diet

You know Josh loves kooky right wing conspiracy theories and will use any excuse he can to tie them back to relationships and male/female power dynamics. So we’re diving in to explore what the cultural implications may be of the bizarre attempt to weaponize the #MeToo movement by Twitter provocateurs Jacob Wohl and Jack Berkman. …Plus it’s just too hilarious not to talk about. Leyla’s getting deep about the romantic relationships of her youth in discussions with her dad (Unfortunately he’s not on the show. Yet).

Finally, Josh has been diving into the world of publications on modern masculinity in search of a single beautiful pearl of healthy wisdom. Will he return from the depths a better stronger man? Or will sink into their depths only to return a swamp thing amalgamation of MRA Red-Pill platitudes? Tune in to find out.

Still Trying - EP 9 - Brought To You By Trains

That’s right bay-bay! Trains are making a comeback in a BIG way. Keep your eyes peeled in 2019 because your two year old nephew has his pulse on all the hottest trends.

In this episode we’ll wipe our hands clean of Brett Kavanaugh and remind you that Bill Clinton’s treatment of women is actually worse. (Send your angry emails to Josh dabbles in a real world version of scenes from the Netflix series Love, taking a date to his version of the Magic Castle. Will he and his date sink or swim? Tune in to find out!

We also return to Reddit, that treasure trove of contemplative content. This time, members of r/datingoverthirty ask “Why won’t he say he loves me?” BECAUSE THAT BOY DON’T LOVE HIMSELF GIRL. GET OUT! GET! OUT!!!

Build your house on stilts cus’ the oceans are rising, but so long as we’re here, we’re gonna keep on trying!

Still Trying - EP 8 - KavaNaw... Oh Hell Naw

TW: This episode contains frank discussion about sexual assault and rape culture that may be difficult for some listeners.

Are we living in a hell world folks? Sure. But (if we may loosely steal from Prince) are we all gathered here today to get through this thing called life? Absolutely. We’re doing our unqualified best on this episode to help navigate the Brett Kavanaugh issue; the fact that as of writing these notes, a man credibly accused of sexual assault who stood in front of a Senate Judiciary Committee and drunkenly ranted about conspiracy theories against him while perjuring himself dozens of times about recorded references to wanton sex acts, is possibly about to take a lifetime seat on the Supreme Court as one of the 9 most powerful people on the planet. But hey, he likes BEER okay? Don’t you like BEER? We all like BEER! I’ve never blacked out from drinking BEER! HAVE YOU SENATOR?!

But to be serious for a bit we’ll explore how we deal with ourselves and our own judgements in light of these things. And what does our cultural reaction to behavior from both the gross, condescending, conservative power structure as well as the purity identity politics, social media woke-tivist crowd tell us to do with masculinity? Is there a place in our society for a non-toxic masculinity?

We also try to perk things up in the second half with a reading series from Connor Kilpatrick’s excellent article from the Summer 2018 issue of Jacobin It’s Okay to Have Children. We’re taking on both liberal and conservative views on who should and shouldn’t have children in our reading series and not pulling punches. Yup. It’s a dating podcast that’s ALL politics today, so send your angry emails to

Still Trying - *sniffle, sniff* Announceme- *AAAHCHOO*

No new episode this week on account of sickness and moving. Maybe someday if ya’ll wanna hook up a fat Patreon following we’ll plow through these sorts of life events. But in lieu of that, when it costs us time and money to do the show, we’re doing us first. Sorry fam. Instead of an episode this week, a brief thank you and request! We’ll see you back in the podosphere in two weeks.

Email us your questions or why you make a worthy guest of the pod:

Still Trying - EP 7 - But Seriously, Who Are OUR Sex And The City Analogs?

TW: This episode briefly and lightly touches on the subject of rape.

Josh is DEFINITELY a Miranda (BTW... Cynthia Nixon just happens to be up for election of Governor of New York in their primary next week. Just sayin.) Leyla could go Carrie or Charlotte though...

But, time to get serious. Josh makes fumbles for your gain. This episode is packed full of dating and life advice as learned from Josh failing to follow it. But growin' up in the aftermath... we hope! It's our first pull from the depths of r/Bumble and the horrors that lurk within. And this is honestly one of the lighter pieces of material you can find in there! We'll also touch on Leyla's newfound restraint from swiping and what it feels like to let the swiping cease. There's also a VERY valuable metaphorical reference to Good Will Hunting that's going to solve all your preservation needs. We swear... or at least Josh does. Leyla's never seen it and fairly thinks it sounds silly. One of the writers was a young Matt Damon and the other was, well... just any age Ben Affleck.

Still Trying - EP 6 - To Reach or Settle?

That is the question today. Put on your science hats folks. We're taking a look at some interesting new data about how we engage with dating apps by Associate Professor of Sociology at the University of Michigan, Dr. Elizabeth Bruch. Apparently we're all on Tinder itching to get a right swipe from somebody 25% "out of our league". We'll sift through the findings of The Atlantic's article on the study (Dude, She’s (Exactly 25 Percent) Out of Your League) and contemplate our own place on the desirability hierarchy. Hint: Like most people, we're probably pretty narcissistic about it.

We'll also work out some dating tips learned from each others dating experiences over the last week, but likely run dry on what to do when sparks don't fly when you give it a whirl with someone who started as a friend first... "I'll see you when I see you? I'll call you?" Eh, more than likely, I'll probably just try to hide in a corner and bury my face in my phone every time I see you out in public forever and ever, amen.

Additional music in today's Episode: "Outta My League" by Team Stray